I don’t know why or how it happened, but I recently realized that I have become one of “those” moms who scopes out and chats up potential boyfriends for my single daughters (ages 23 and 17). I have read about and heard talk of these moms, but I never thought I would be one of them! Honestly, I don’t know why this “matchmaking condition” is happening. It is like some alien force has taken over and I just can’t seem to help myself. I am certain of one thing…my daughters do not appreciate this behavior and, quite frankly, neither do I. This “condition” (that’s what I prefer to call it) became apparent on Friday when I took my youngest daughter Anya to a local photography studio to have her senior photos taken.
The first photographer (there were two…don’t ask me why), who took the indoor photos, was an enthusiastic, friendly, attractive young man somewhere between the ages of 19-23. He and my daughter had several things in common and the conversation seemed to flow naturally around these subjects. After he finished shooting his round of photos, we had a few minutes before the outdoor photographer was ready. During our brief wait, the conversation continued and I was amazed at how much you can learn a lot about someone who is willing to talk in a short amount of time. As the three of us were chatting, I was thinking how he would be a good match for Anya (depending on his age) and if not for her, then for my oldest daughter Kailey. Before I could get around to asking this young man’s age, the outdoor photographer interrupted the fun saying he was ready for the outside shots (the outdoor photographer was way too old for my girls, but maybe my Mom…no, I’m just kidding). Anya and I said goodbye to our new photographer friend and headed outside.
While Anya was busy striking a pose, I noticed a young man around her age waiting patiently to speak to the photographer. The young man and I said hello, I commented on how blasted hot it was outside and he agreed. That was all it took to get him talking. He told me how the photographer working with my daughter was really good and how he (the young man) had just picked up his proofs and was waiting to thank the photographer for a job well done. Before too long, he was sharing his photos with me and I was learning all sorts of interesting information about him (what school he went to, what kind of car he drives, what his hobbies are and so on). As the young man started to leave, I told him to enjoy his senior year and he replied by saying “You too” (ha, I wish) and “Tell your daughter to enjoy her year as well.” I was impressed with this young man’s appearance, manners and conversational skills and .found myself thinking how it would be fine with me if Anya dated a boy like him. That is when it occurred to me that I had become “one of those moms” and I tell you it was quite a shocking discovery.
I think this matchmaking condition only affects moms/daughters, because I have never, not even once, heard my husband comment on how some guy would be good boyfriend material for one of our girls. Actually, the boys my girls have had the misfortune of introducing to their dad go away from that encounter all scared of him and stuff…one of Kailey’s ex-boyfriends, six years later, is still afraid of my husband. Whether or not it’s a mom/daughter thing, the cold hard truth is, my attempts at matchmaking are futile ones. The mere fact that I discover what I believe to be the perfect match for one of my girls will immediately cause my daughters to disqualify said person as potential dating material…all that work for nothing! I’m fairly certain my sons will not be affected by my matchmaking condition, because I just don’t believe there is a girl on earth who could possibly pass my quality control standards…just joking…I think. To my two beautiful daughters I can only say I apologize for this embarrassing condition and I will do my best to get it under control. In the meantime, to all the motivated, kind, sincere and respectful young men in the world I just want to know “Have you met my daughter?”
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